A Star from Mosul

I was surfing the net few days ago, and I found the sites of most of the channels the Arabs watch these days.. I thought you might be interested in them.

• BBC WORLD : I'm sure you know about it!
  
• Al-Sharqia: Which is an Iraqi channel. The site is still under construction.
• Abu Dhabi: From Emirates.
• MBC: This is Lebanese I guess.
  
• Channel 2 (MBC2): For me, this is my home on the satellite! It's the best. Although it only views the movies after they're too old, and it keeps repeating things.
• Al-Arabia: It's one of two of the best news channels. The site is still under construction, it's only in Arabic and visitors can comment over the news. It has one page in English, which is History and profile about the channel.. And it has some other links to English pages with information about the channel.
  
• Dubai TV: From Dubai. I personally like a channel called CH33 from Dubai, but couldn't find a site for it.
  
• Future: It's Lebanese. It views Superstar, which is the Arabic version of the American idol.
  
• Dream: two channels, probably Egyptian. Mom watches Dream2, and I watch it with her sometimes.
• Iqra: An Egyptian, Islamic channel. Only in Arabic, but it has some programmes in English.
• LBC: A Lebanese channel. It viewed Star Academy, which is also an Arabic version of a foreign idea.. I hate this show!

The ones I regularly watch are in bold.
For more, this is a link to a list of all the channels in Arabsat and links to the channels in it.
And this is for Nilesat.

I don't feel like posting, but I'm Okay; although a car bomb exploded not too far from our house, it shook the whole house, but no windows were broken.

This is the latest picture of Aya.. In her bed. I couldn't resist posting it! For those who still remember Gargoor, he's the orange thing in the left corner, over the bed..



Aya's dad went back to Baghdad, after losing hope to continue his study in Mosul. You can say that this year, about 7 eye doctors died from different causes in Mosul! He won't find anyone to teach him anything here..

It's been a long time since I went to school! Too many days of laziness! But, I went to school today. We took about 5 lessons, and we were surprised by how the weather is COLD; Much colder than I expected!

They said that the Passing-the-year system is back! So, I should study well this year, get very good marks (All above 90, this probably won't be a problem) and then study more in the break so that I can take the final exams of next year at the end of the break and then Puffff! I'm in collage, and I've passed the 6th grade! Wow, this would be a dream coming true. I'm searching for a post in which I talked about passing-a-year system, but I couldn't find it, if anybody did, please send the link to me!

Thanks for everyone who suggested books for me. But, now, I probably won't have time to read anything that is not educational. I was thinking of reading some in the break, but now, I don't even have a break! As for "Gone by the wind" I think I've seen the film, and if I did, then I've cried at the end. I saw it in a time in which I had tears left in my eyes to waste on a film! And I've dreamt of reading about Harry potter or at least see the film from what I've heard about it. I've played a game about him once (Not for a long time). I really enjoy such things!
As for "Anne frank diary", I've heard of this girl alot since I started my blog! I'll try to find something about her when I finish school.
As for "Lord of the rings", well, I've heard about this one too.. I also saw the Oscars and its film WON. Yey! This will go in my list too.
Every thing about Sherlock holmes will go to the list, I like this man!
And my childhood dream, "The thousand and one noghts"! It'll be great if I found this one!
I think I'll enjoy this one too,"Alice's adventures in Wonderland". Thanks CharlesWT, the link is great!!

I've always liked stories.. Till now, and everytime mom knocks the door, I ask her to show me her WHITE hand. I took this idea from a story that might be called "the wolf and the 7 goats" I can't remember! I also ask mom to throw me in the forest with a peace of bread, the idea was taken from a story that might be called "The thumbnail!" that little boy who's parents are poor.

The others, I'll try to remember them later. Who said that I'll be able to find any of those here in Iraq! But I'll try to manage something.

In the morning today, my uncle stepped by our house before going to work and congratulated us for Eid. He lives in the other side of the river and he couldn't come and visit us earlier. It was a good way to start the day!

I discovered something. When I say, I'm bored, I can't study, I'm too miserable and you say, you have the right to be like that, you have too many things in mind, I don't blame you; Although I really get relieved, but I don't get more active, happy, or positive! I just accept myself the way I am! So, let's make an agreement, if I once said that I'm too tired and I can't study, remind me of this or just write how you would've read inspite of all this in order to get a better life afterwards! Okay? This is not hard. And if you have another idea, tell me, I'd be happy to know 'em.
E-mails are a little hard to be read or replied to in the present time, so don't expect a reply! But I won't ignore them, all the e-mails will be read by me, although I sometimes skip the links to news or such stuff.

I really have missed this title "What's happening?", I missed reading the comments and being able to remove the bad ones!! Nice :)

Today, at 7PM, we had electricity for the first time in 35 hours!! We spent all this time on the generators. There was no problem except for water. Water is so cold in winter, the heaters only operate on electricity (Although we have non-electric heaters, but dad hoped that the electricity will come soon and he didn't turn them on), and with no heaters, we have very cold water!
At night yesterday, I brushed my teeth, the water was so cold that all my teeth started aching! I didn't dare to wash my face with such cold water although I needed to (I've declared a war against acne!).

Today, I heard one BIG explosion and few far shooting! Nothing close to us.
I'm having a difficulty with studying. Although we didn't go back to school, but we do need to study! Whenever I take a school-book to read, I lose any desire to study. Whenever I take a book (Any book but not a school-book), I start reading right away with no laziness! We might go back to schools if things stayed that way, calm and stable compared to the past few days.

Tomorrow is my friend's birthday! I've fixed my mobile to remind me of it, and it rang at 9PM reminding me! We don't usually buy BIG or expensive gifts to each other. Just small, simle ones with a nice card. I guess even this won't be managed this year. I'll try to find something, but HOW? I don't even have a picture of both of us on this computer, I would've made a card and printed it! I can scan a picture of us, but in the last one, we both looked dead! We don't even have a photo of the two of us only! (Update: I found a great site for creating printable cards.. For FREE! And since I have a blck-and-white printer, I'll colour it myself!! I hope she'll like it. Plus, HNK says that I have a necklace that I haven't used, my friend likes such things very much, I'll look for it and if it's nice, I'll wrap it nicely and put the card on it!).

I've forgot to congratulate you on the thanksgiving yesterday, but it seems like it last for a long time! So, happy thanksgiving for everyone who celebrates it!

HNK will come and work on the computer now. I want to write more, and I can but I'll have to wait for an hour. It's 12:43PM now, and I guess my dear worm bed upstairs will win and prevent me from writng more today!

Well, HNK decided to go to bed and leave the computer for me! So, I'll say some more things and go to sleep too..

For the second time since starting this blog, and few days ago, someone I know and who doesn't know about my blog, visits it and wrote an e-mail admiring it!! They didn't know that I'm Najma but I couldn't hide it and told them right away. One of them who's parents are my parents' friends, and the other was HNK's classmate in the primary school! It is so exciting to read such letters. Nevertheless, none of my old friends found it!

And now, dear bed, here I come :)

Good night everybody,
Najma

I'm sorry but including America and Israel (and even Kuwait) in there is typical Arab "conspiracy theory" talk. Who are these "vandals" from Israel and America? Have you seen any? The truth is that fourth group, of people from other countries, includes mostly foreign Islamic terrorists from places like Syria, Saudi Arabia, etc.

I didn't say "From" Israel and America, I said "work" for Israel and America.. If you don't believe it, nobody asked you to!! Just ask how many Israelis have got into Iraq and especially the North after the war. I haven't seen any, because I can't recognize the vandal (Update: A friend recommended that I should use SABOTEUR instead) from the fellow human being!

If the jihadists are truly interested in removing the occupation forces they would being doing everything in their power to speed elections and to put in place a government opposed to the coalitions presence.

Unfortunately, the elections is not the most thing the Iraqis I know want now.. Because they're not trusting that honest elections will be done at the present time. I think the Jihadis have similar point of view.. The current situation doesn't allow lots of Iraqis to vote freely, don't tell me we can, you don't know how a war is!! A brief description to it from a letter I've got from a reader of this blog, he's Lebanese!!

I used to think I was invincible during the war, until a particularly horrible week of fighting. After that i was scared, scared of thunder, scared of doors slamming shut, of any loud noise. I don't know if you are still in the invincible stage, or the scared stage, but if you are in the former, don't do stupid things. My dad and I would ride horses even though we knew there were snipers (stupid). For someone who has not been in a war, it is impossible to understand, the loss of control, school open school closed, road open/closed, electricity on/off, phones on/off, shooting on/off. One cannot make a plan beyond a few hours. The radio or the news is always on. After a while, the whole city does not need to be calm for you to feel better, just your neighborhood. In Lebanon, there was always fighting somewhere, but if it was 5km away, we didn't care!

And that's what someone said in her blog, I didn't figure out from where she is!! (Update: She's a HE! And he's from the United states):

How with dozens of major daily attacks going on they expect people to peacefully cast a ballot is beyond me. This is a total political gimmick so they can say they had a vote. What we'll end up with is maybe 20% of the country registering and then them saying to the world well, 50% of those registered voted! In reality that means only 10% of the country. You can't expect people to stand in line at a polling place with men firing RPG's on the street or tanks operating nearby or car bombs going off. My question to the Americans is "If you can't guard a few power plants successfully then how you going to guard a few thousand polling places?"

I want to apologize to free, thanks for clearing the Hajji thing for me..

Second, you stated that the two groups, jihadis and the Saddam supporter joined together in Fallujah to form two groups. Which group does Zarqawi(sp) belong?? Is he a jihadi or a Saddam supporter?? Since he is a foreigner I suggest that he is not a Saddam support.

God!! I asked dad to read my replies before posting them, and gave him a paper to write his corrections on. His fond is unreadable!! Doctors' fonts always are unreadable!!

I didn't know of Al-Zarkawi, didn't even think that such person exists!! Dad suggests that he's just an imaginary person made by the Americans to make the resistance look worse! At least that's what I understood of what he wrote!! Believe me, faking someone exists is so easy nowadays, especially with the technology we have!

If he does exist, then he doesn't belong to either of them.. He beheaded people, he wants division between the Iraqis, if he isn't an Iraqi (Supporter of Saddam) then he's obviously a sobateurs!! The forth group!

When the Americans first arrived in Mosul and the Iraqis chose to loot their neighbors, their hospitals, and other institutions why didn't the Iraqis do anything to stop what was happening...why was it up to the American soldiers??

The stealing and robbing thing started on Thursday after noon . On Friday, and at the Friday prayer, the Imam told the men in my neighborhood that "the robbers are willing to destroy our city, and that what they're doing is haram (Not allowed in Islam). With no police and no army, you'll have to protect your city by your own! " After all the mosques announced that, some people returned the things back to the mosques!

It wasn't up to the American soldiers. Not at all.. All the neighbors (Muslims and Christians) gathered 24 hours/day, sat in the streets with their weapons. It was so cold then, every day, they bring heaters or make a fire. At night, the youth used to stay and give the elders time to sleep. When it's time to pray, the Christian took the responsibility to guard the street and let the Muslims go to the mosques.

Every time the mosque gets an attack, the Imam shouts for the men to come and save it.

The men of the neighborhood (Including dad) didn't expect this number of people to come stealing, tens of people as I said before came (Either walking or in cars), people came from the North with the American troops with an aim which is to STEAL.. They attached yellow flags over their cars (Yellow flags refer to Kurdistan often). The men of the neighborhood blocked the streets and didn't let anyone pass unless they check his car. They took everything that is stolen (Too many things) and kept it in the mosque, and after that the school's owners and other people came to take their possessions.
The Kurdistani government then announced that those are not peshmerga who came. Dad has too many patients from the north, they regularly come to his clinic and they like him. Some came and told him not to be afraid since the Kurds came only to rob the government buildings, not houses!!

A surprising thing was that a woman came and told our neighbors that her sons are stealing and dad and some other neighbors went and took the things back to the mosque!!

Should they have shot their M-16s at anyone stealing a lamp?

No, just stop him and take the lamp somewhere safe!!! How hard is that? Killing is not the solution of everything.

Exactly what type of Jihadis are we talking here? The kind that indulge in beheadings, torture and summary executions?

No, those are either the sobateurs (The 4th group) or Saddam's allies (The 3rd group).

You doubt the death of Margaret Hassn? Well I really hope you are right. But I think you are only fooling yourself.

They didn't say she died. Her husband said today that he wants her back (Alive or dead).. I'm not defending her kidnappers, whether they killed her or not, they are BAD people.

BTW, I personally don't think anyone has a right to tell someone what they can and cannot wear. Be it France or the so called Jihadis.

That's my opinion too.. People, the whole point of the post was that you shouldn't say a jihadi over everything!! Those are not Jihadis, Jihadis only want Americans. Got it??

the US government has invested heavily into a grand plan for what they'd like Iraq to become (a democratic and capitalistic society).

Some point you might want to understand is, don't believe everything your media wants you to believe.. You have freedom and you should think by your own. I hardly see an American who doesn't agree with the WAR!!

You don't count the Shias groups.

I live in Mosul.. I've only seen one shiee in my life! I don't know anything about them, and I don't want to assume either.

1) What do you believe freedom means?

I'm still learning about it but till now. It's not a good thing unless it has boundaries which is something the Iraqis haven't been warned of! It's doing what you want. Remember: Doing what you want is freedom, liking what you do is happiness. I prefer happiness that freedom. Who doesn't?

2) Should anyone, Sunni, shia or Christian or any other faith be able to practice their religion as they see fit?

Surely yes.

3) Should someone have to wear a hijab if it is not part of their religious belief?

No.. God, back to this point again. They were not Jihadis. In fact the Jihadis declared that the ones who said such things are not Jihadis but other groups.
BTW: Christians won't need to wear Hijab anymore.. Ramadan is over! Neither do Muslims.. Remember: Rose's daughter is Muslim like her mom, and she had to wear it against her will too.

4) Should someone be able to tell another person what they should wear or what religion they must follow?

No. But they can just advice.. No "musts".

5) Should another person be punished for not following someone else's religion? For not wearing the clothes or hijab that someone else says they should?

No..

6) Should somebody be able to keep you from learning to read or write or sing or listen to music or go to school?

No.. Nobody did yet.. And I hope nobody will!!

7) Should someone be able to keep you from using the computer and talking on this forum or posting your thoughts or looking up information from another website? (except your father or mother of course Smile as you must do your chores and eat sometime Smile )

I didn't understand the last part.. But NO.

8) Cool If someone does not believe like you do, should they be whipped or beaten or shot or have their head taken?

What do you think?? From what I've said in my blog, from the first day and till now. Do I or any other true Muslim believe in beheading??? NO and NO and again NO..

Come on Muslims, defend your religion. Jihad is not by the sword only, it's by the pen (And in my case, the keyboard)

9) Do you honestly believe that your teachers, who are not Muslim, like to wear the hijab?

They surely don't.

10) Do you think that, because you are faithful to your religion and have sympathy for the jihadi, that they would tell you that they like it because they fear that you will tell someone that they said otherwise?

They didn't say they liked it.. They just accepted it. They want peace. I'm defending them here.

i am a Iraqi national guardmans. my broter was shoot by insurgents. i fight with americans does that make me and my broter enemies. ask this question to you. did my broter deserved to die! i fight these people for all iraqis. they are not true muslims. they are evil people with no care for me or you. americans work with us to make iraq better they care not like insurgents.

You're Iraqis. You're not my enemies. Who shot him are probably Saddam's supporters, and you know it!

At the end, I want you to look at these.. Not all of you, just the ones who think that Arabs are the only ones who have terrorists among them!!
Thanks Liminal for finding it!!

And here's what a friend (An American Muslim) thought about Hajji and Jihadi.. We both didn't know why you used the word Hajji when we wrote what we wrote but anyway,

I have been thinking about why the two sides fighting are hating each other more and more, and I have noticed that sometimes even well-meaning people on both sides have been ignorant about certain things, about each other, and unknowingly insulting or wanting to destroy the other side, making everyone just more angrier at each other when they are supposed to be working together. We need to learn about each other to know who our enemies are and who they are not. For example, I see a lot of soldiers and Americans calling the people they are killing "hajjis" or "jihadis" as if this is something to brag about or means "success." These are the wrong words to use. A hajji is someone pious and peaceful that has made a pilgrimage to a holy site. Even Jesus, Moses, and Abraham (peace be upon them) made pilgrimages and so each was a "hajji". Who started using this word in the wrong way and why are people using it to say the person they killed was a "terrorist"? When Muslims hear Americans and others calling someone a "Hajji" as if it is a bad thing, it sounds like they are calling all Muslims terrorists, that they are happy to be fighting in a crusade to kill Muslims and Islam. This is so wrong - so sad! Also a jihadi.. this is not a terrorist either. Anyone that is struggling to do the will of God, struggling to do the right thing, is a jihadi. Even the American and coalition troops can be called "jihadis" because they are struggling to do what THEY think is right. Jesus was a jihadi, too.

Okay, I'll take a little rest from POLITICS right now.. It's getting too cold in Mosul. I've also read that it's snowing in the North of Iraq. I've always wondered how it feels while snowing, but last year is snowed for the first time in my life (It has snowed before but not in the time when I started having some memories!!) .. I felt so happy, excited and cold then! Although it didn't snow alot but we did make a snowman after all! On mom's cars! We had a big difficulty trying to keep his head on his body.
Next day, you could see cars with the snow-mans on them! Funny.

Things are getting more stable.. Here's a blog from Mosul some of you have mentioned to me but I didn't visit it till today, I only read the last post, and it is true.. So, go and read it for more information.

We've switched the Internet connection to 24 hours again. We only spent 25 hours on-line last month and we were charged for 53!! Apparently, somebody stole some hours! We still don't know how much we'll pay, but for this month, we'll pay 40$ instead of 50$ because the company decided to make an exception for the teachers in Universities and dear mom is a teacher there so!! Yahoo!

Okay, I'll go read some e-mails now..

PS: I sent an e-mail for most of the Iraqi bloggers asking them for their opinion about the previous post. We'll see what they say!

To discuss this, go here:
http://www.wordsfromiraq.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=162&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=0

I talked to you about it before.. This is one side of the flyer we got.. It says: "They didn't think that we saw them, but those who work with al-Zarkawi are being watched"

This is the other side, it says: "If you helped al-Zarkawi or his people, your house will be like this one"

What you see as the INSURGENTS, or the resistance are actually divided into groups.. After a long discussion between me and dad, he decided that they're probably four groups.

First, what Free0352 (The American US marine) once said here in the comments' section:

its hard sometimes to put aside the Hajji and see the Iraqi…the fellow human being

is completely unreasonable, since a hajji has nothing to do with any of these groups more than what a fellow human being has!! A hajji is a fellow human being who did a must in Islam which is Haj.. See, nothing to do with killing, jihad or destruction!!

Here are the groups:

• The Jihadis المجاهدين: They resist the foreign occupation, to protect their country from it according to a religious order. Those are known of warning the people before attacking a certain region, they make sure that they know that in this time they'll come. And they've announced, more than once, and in different places in Mosul, especially in mosques, that they're not attacking any of the Iraqi Police, the Iraqi army, and the civilians.. Their only aim is the occupation troops.
• The criminals and robbers that Saddam has released before the war: Saddam has used to release the criminals and robbers from the Iraqi prisons every while. We see 'em on TV praising him and admiring him after their release!! They're a bunch of people who broke the law, got loosed in the streets. With no real authority in Iraq, and no job for them to gain their living, they decided to make some gangs. The aim is to steal (houses, shops, cars and government buildings!) and to kidnap innocent people in order to get money in return!!
• The Ba'athis, the Fedayeen and part of the soldiers of the old Iraqi army: Those people found themselves without jobs after the war and with no source of money. So, they made some groups under the name of RESISTANCE. The aim is to make people feel that other regime after Saddam is worse than Saddam's, and the situation after Saddam Hussein is going from BAD to WORSE. So, they attack the policemen, and the Iraqi army and the government buildings for this aim!
• The vandals who work for foreign countries (eg. America, Israel, Iran, Kuwait.. Or any other neighboring country): Their only aim is to make a status of horror and untrust, to threat the university teachers, doctors and the other valuable citizens of Iraq to make them go out of Iraq, they might even kill some of them. And to destroy the main power sources of Iraq, like oil pipelines, electricity stations and government's buildings. For example, the assassination of Margaret Hassan, if it's true!! Here's what Shawn thought in his blog, did you think the same way??

"These cowards hide behind their religion, and use Islam as a justification for their murderous actions; and yet their actions go totally against the teachings of their (I'd like to replace this with "This instead of "Their" since it might not even be their religion!!) religion. The woman they kidnapped was also a Muslim who had dedicated her life to helping the poor and helpless. They murdered this helpless woman in cold blood, and blocked a major charity from helping the children of Iraq. On its own, this act is one of unspeakable evil. But, the fact that it was carried out in the name of God makes it far worse."

Some of you are confused now the same as I am, and some just say that these are lies and nothing is true.. Long discussions over that will be made here, so I'll just close the comments section for this post. You'll find this place good for discussion.. For those of you who're willing to continue reading this, here are some questions I asked dad:

This question, I'm not the only one who's curious about.. Many of you are. Remember when Rose at "Diary in Baghdad" said that her sister in Mosul is unsatisfied with how her daughter will have to wear Hijab at school because some groups have hanged signs in the streets that everyone should wear hijab.. I'm not sure about the signs in the streets, but I surely heard about this and I've seen it done in my school. My Physics teacher, my Chemistry teacher (Both Christian) and my Christian friends, wore Hijab after leaving school. I didn't hear them complain about it. Some even said that they'll do anything just to get security and health. The aim of this warning was either a response to the French government's decision to remove Hijab in France, or because of the last group's will to divide the Iraqis!!

What about the Jihadis? Why won't they go somewhere far from the civilians and fight? Why here??
The Jihadis want the Americans, they'd kill them where they are. If the Americans are in the deserts, there they will fight. If they're here, here they will fight! And since the Americans like hanging out here, here is the fight! So, a little piece of recommendation for the occupation, build your base somewhere far, we'll be safe then.

Aha, then who do you think wrote those threats on the walls of a school to the people who participate in the elections?
Those are the vandals (The forth group again!) who want to spread division between the Iraqis, who want everything to be not Okay..

Why do people hate the Americans? Why do these groups hate 'em?
For two obvious reasons.. When the Americans controlled Mosul, and from the first day, we saw tens of people walking in the street infront of our house, carrying stolen things!! From houses, and from the government buildings including schools and universities.. For me, it was a mess. We even saw two kids playing with patient;s bed from a hospital (A bed that has wheels), one was lying on it and the other was pushing him along the street!! People carrying everything starting from computers' mice, to ceiling fans, to couches!! We see them on TV stealing vases, air-conditions, water-coolers, computers, rugs!! Everything! We see cars full of stolen things.. All this happened under the eyes of the Americans, with their approval. The Americans didn't do a thing towards the people coming from the North and the neighbouring countries trying to steal things. In days, you can see the streets full of weapons, RPG's and bombs being sold!! The bombs were shockly CHEAP! The Americans didn't do a thing!! It was an obvious move of them, they were like making sure that in weeks, all the Iraqis will have weapons to fight with each other!!

The groups might fight with each other, like what happened when the robbers (Or the vandals) tried to steal a bank in Mosul. The Jihadis came and fought them and killed some of them! The same when the kidnappers kidnapped a man and the Jihadis went there and saved him! But, the jihadis can't just stand infront of a bank and guard it. Their job is to hit and run, if they stopped, they get killed.

Two or more groups might unite at some time without noticing it or with noticing it. Like what happened in Falloja: Saddam's supporters and the Jihadis united against the Americans since it was an attack against their city, both will get hurt, so they united. We have a saying that I'd like to say here:
"Me and my brother against my cousin. Me and my cousin against the stranger!!"
"انا و اخي على ابن عمي، انا و ابن عمي على الغريب "

This is all assuming.. There might be more groups!! Who knows? You surely don't! And after all, if anyone wanted to praise politics, the most he can say is "It's a dirty game!!"..

I was reading yesterday before going to sleep, a book that has collection of scientific subjects and stories in English.. When I decided to stop, I thought of taking a look at what I'll read in the coming days. There was a sentence that attracted me and rang a bell in my head, it says:
"Have you heard of the man who swam halfway across the ocean, then decided he couldn't make it and swam back?"..

God, I wish I won't hear about him, not in this life!!

Najma..
Less confused, and less angry than you are.. Feeling strangely ACTIVE! Weird!!

Yeppy, I saw two more uncles today. It was calm in the morning, so we went out and visited two of my uncles, and then dropped by my big sister's house and I saw my brother-in-law for the first time for a month, and he was alright as it seemed, a little angry at crying Aya..

The weather was nice and the sky was really blue with white big nice clouds. The water is the street is reflecting the blueness of the sky and all the other things were washed by the rain. I took some pictures that I'll try to post here..

We made an arrangement with my sister and her husband that we'll come tomorrow and take Aya to stay with us till the curfew (At 4PM).
Nobody seems to be going to school soon, and the parents aren't ready to send their kids there..

We also bought bread, we've been unable to buy it for a week, now I can eat sandwitches as much as I want.. We bought falafel too, which is by the way my favourite meal.

There are no Police nor American soldiers in the streets we went through, just people.. The gasoline stations were full, and there were also a long line of cars and the drivers were waiting to their turn to fill their cars.

We can see those black pieces of cloth that the Iraqis have used to write their dead people's names on, plenty of them were hanged along the road, most of them were killed by either the terrorists or the American soldiers.. I've called my friend yesterday who told me about her brother's friend who is in the medical school.. Robbers have tried to kill him and his 18-year-old brother for their car but for some reason didn't get the car, the 18-year-old one died and the other is in the hospital now.. In the same accident, a woman with her infant were crossing the street, the infant got a bullet and died in the hospital!!

As some Iraqis have used the walls to practice their free speech after the war, a wall of a school has a writing that says: "We'll kill everyone who'll participate in the elections", in Arabic.. I was few days ago urging my parents to go participate in the elections, if we didn't vote, who will!! But, I guess I'll stop urging anyone now since it's a dangerous thing like everything else.. Let's just hope that the ones who'll vote will vote for the RIGHT person.

More news: Neurotic wife's husband came back at last..
And check this out. For those of you who are interested, there are also a forum of discussion!!
And this too..
PS: Just forget what I said about how calm it is.. It's not calm anymore!! Oops!

I discovered yesterday that Incredimail (the program I use for receiving my e-mail) can't receive my hotmail e-mails anymore!! At least not the new account. So, I'm very sorry, you don't have to resend the e-mails you've sent to my new e-mail, I'll read them from there but whoever wants to send e-mails, send them to nblog04@gmail.com
I'm so sorry, but the mistakes make us learn new things I guess!! Gmail does pop its e-mails and that's great!! For free!!

As for school, I haven't gone there for a week now.. And it looks like nobody is going to go at least not till Saturday (If things calmed down a little).. Well, I'm sure it's drowning with rain now because it rained a lot yesterday.

I saw a great film about our prophet Mohammed (PBUH) on TV yesterday at night.. It was in English and I thought you might really like it.

Please visit these links for more information about it since it has information about Islam and the 11th of September.. It also has interviews with American Muslims and Iraqis who ran away from Iraq sometime ago..

The links:

• http://www.pbs.org/muhammad/
• http://www.pbs.org/muhammad/muhammadand.shtml
• http://www.pbs.org/muhammad/film.shtml

You can also see when it's going to be broadcasted in your area.. Please, do ot just ignore it.. It's a message of God, don't waste it..

I woke up on hope to get out of the house, I had my breakfast, we called all my uncles and decided to gather all in my uncle's house at 11AM. That was great, I would see all my uncles..! But, the Mosul TV declared that all the 5 bridges of Mosul will be blocked for 24 hours.. This made mom and dad think of the possibility of attacks, again calls between everybody and the visit was cancelled!!
I was so depressed.. Here it is, the Eid will end today, and I haven't seen any of my uncles! In fact, I haven't seen any of my uncles for a month! Nothing was on TV but depressing NEWS, so I just threw my self to bed and slept for around 4 more hours..
When I woke up, the soldiers have surrounded the neighbourhood and tere were fights everywhile, we got stuck at our house AGAIN. Mom, dad and HNK were watching cinderella on TV in Turkish. They didn't find anything on Nilesat satellite so they switched to the Turkish satellite in which everything is in Turkish, even the American movies!! So, I realised that it's not only me who's bored..

I've finished a very useful English teaching book named "BASIC vocabulary in use".. Mom has bought it for me from what's like a place that shows books for sale for a limited time.. It surely improved my vocabulary! I hope ;)

Okay, if I'm bored, this doesn't necessarily mean that I should make you bored too, so byee.

PS: At 6PM yesterday, fights started again, so it wasn't a calm day as I thought.

God!! Stop fighting with each other! I just read the comments, some of them are really sweet, I didn't notice anything bad about them till others start fighting about it.

Dear anonymous friends, I have to apologize, I'll only permit comments made by a username. Make yourselves a username so that people won't have to talk to you by the time you posted the comment (e.g.. 2:30).. Sorry, but that would be much better.. (I have Aya sitting in my lap right now, stretching her muscles after a long sleep :)).

About the ones who really want to know if I'm pro/anti coalition forces. Deciding is so hard, I used to write in a diary during and before the war but stopped on April this year, on the day in which the Americans *liberated* us, I was so happy.. I was definitely pro the coalition. Till what happened in Abu-Graib, I was ready to kill one of them at that time.. Seeing our men in a state like that, makes anyone have a big amount of hatred.. And then started the mixed feelings, don't know whether to hate or not, but I definitely don't either love or like them. Some of their actions make me angry, they killed two innocent people on the bridge today and yesterday without even warning them.

Dad is now stuck in the street, the Americans are surrounding the neighborhood, mom went out to see if he can come from another way but they
shoot in the sky to frighten her so she got in.. How do you want me to feel?? If you don't like the way I think, and if you really care as you said about whether I'm pro or anti, then just leave this blog!

Am I not getting too many prayers? Thank you people! That's much appreciated.

And now, it's Doc's turn.. The one who made me really angry! How many times do I have to get through this over and over.. Well, I AM Iraqi, it's not my fault that I make stupid mistakes in English, or sometimes don't make any.

How smart I will be telling you where I exactly live in Mosul or what my real name is!! I don't have to trust you if you don't trust me. The electricity is not good, but we have generators.. We have Internet, I pay 50 cents for each hour of connection, and I'm not asking you for anything in return.

Okay, today is the first day of Eid.. I was mistaken when I said it was yesterday, it's just confusing because the mosques did say that it was yesterday but then we had an announcement on TV that denies it, so we just fasted another day and started the Eid today.
It doesn't seem like we're going out of the house! Although I really wish I will since I spent a lot of time fixing my hijab!! Mom and dad went and took Aya to spend the day here and then they'll drive her back to her mom before the curfew starts at 4 o'clock. They say that the Americans release violent dogs in the streets at night so that people won't get out (I want some respect!! Dogs!). I remember when I used to get bored at night when people start leaving and the Eid ends, now I haven't even seen any of my uncles since dad came back from Egypt.

My bundle of joy (As someone once called her) came today with a toy from her dad, he calls it Gargoor, it's one of the characters of Semsimi street (Not sure of the spelling).. Mom gave her her gift of Eid from yesterday, it's that thing that spins over her head on her bed at night and sings. Her mom said that the emotions on her face when the toys started spinning and singing (Twinkle Twinkle little star!!) were unexplainable, she was totally surprised and excited. She's surely helped her father a lot these days, she's talking to him all the time.. She doesn't speak Arabic yet, just Irr, Orr, Arr and such words.

Now, dad arrived at my uncle's house and he's calling every while complaining about not being able to come back.. We're not in a curfew at this time, why can't he get here!! He probably won't have lunch with us. He's bought 5 chickens to my brother-in-law's family for lunch and he won't be able to get it there.. It passed lunch time, it's now 1:40PM.

I really appreciate your concern, I don't hate a whole group for the acts of few.
I know there are bad guys in each country and each city, I've seen neighbors in America (Of course on TV) that I'm sure if I stayed in one for few minutes, I'll get killed. You can't just worn us and tell us to leave Mosul before you destroy it, what will happen if we left and came back to see the house gone!! Can we start from ZERO again!! So many won't be able to leave, as it happened in Falloja, some would prefer to die in pride than to live in shame (And that's not stupidity, that's reality). Some don't have transportation, or the money to leave.

Please don't just assume that we left and start shooting and destroying! Can't you get rid of few but by killing many others.. Here you went, killed everybody in Falloja, why? To get rid of Al-Zarkawy. Did you get rid of him? Apparently not!! He escaped.. If you kept destroying every city he escapes to, there won't be an Iraq any more! We found papers on the roof of our house with pictures of burning houses, and it says "That's what will happen to you if you cooperate with Al-Zarqawi", what to comment on this?? I don't have a clue..

Do we have the right to fight who kill us? Absolutely yes. Do we have the right to defend our selves? Surely yes..And apparently, not only Iraqis are the ones who agree with the resistance. Do we have the right to behead people, kill policemen, kidnap Iraqis and foreign citizens? Surely and absolutely not (Meaning: I'm not pro-Al-Zarqawi). Am I scared? No, just a little afraid of the future and what it might bring, there are soldiers and strykers just in front of my house now, they shot my neighbors when they came home but they fortunately didn't hurt them. The soldiers get paid for fighting, we get death.. The soldiers get paid if they die, we get nothing. Inspite of everything that's happening in Mosul, Mosul TV urges us not to spread rumors, it says that we shouldn't believe what the Arabian media is saying about the bad situation, and they end their stupid speech with "Mosul is a peaceful and calm city"!!! What!!

Yeah. Americans have the right to be angry and bomb 2+ countries and kill hundreds of thousands of people but Iraqis...oh, that's a different matter. How dare they kill a few hundred people? Of course they don't have the right to be angry. If we bomb a few of their countries and try to install a puppet government..well, they have to accept it. How dare they resist! How dare they shoot back when we try to kill them?

That's what it sounds like. Maybe you don't feel that way, maybe you really feel that you or your son or brother or fellow American in Iraq is really
trying to help Iraq and maybe they are...but it sure doesn't feel that way to the ' other side', the side that is Muslim or Iraqi or Arab.

Essence, you're a bright star!! Thanks for your defense.

Dad came.. :))

The internet didn't come back.. I hope it will!! I've been writing this for a long time and I need to publish it. It's now 6:48PM, Aya got stuck in our house because there are barbed wires in the street and There's a car in front of our house, a white Volvo.. The Americans have killed the driver!! The door is opened and the car is parked in the middle of the street with a lake of blood under it. He got killed in the first day of Eid!

PS: Now, we can know when the mosque is going to do Athan a moment before it does. The Americans start shooting to worn us from leaving our house for
prayer!! If I stopped blogging for awhile, this doesn't necessarily mean that I died or ran away, it might mean that the Internet connection cut off
somehow like it did now.

14th of November


Guess what?? We've just came back from my cousin's house.. YES, we did get out of the house, at last. The streets are kind of normal so we went and visited my aunt, and there we saw some other relatives.. As usual, my uncle made a long political discussion. They fought and fought but when the relatives left, they hugged him before leaving!! I wish things can be that way. My American friend always talks to me about such things and how everybody was devided before the elections between Kerry and Bush, but when the elections stopped, everything went back to normal.. Then, we went to my cousin's house, he's just like a brother!! He might read this tomorrow ;). In our way back we met our neighbors and stopped in the street and talked a little, it was a normal day, except for the white Volvo..
Dad went to it and took pictures to the lake of BLOOD and to the door and to the driver's seat covered with blood. Fortunately, some of the neighbors have moved the car from the middle of the street, and others guarded it from being robbed.. But, I can't publish the pictures because the camera (Which is my cousin's, but he gave it to dad when he came to Mosul-- Remember him?? The silly one-- so that dad can get it to Egypt) is now in Baghdad.. Let's just hope that he won't delete the pictures, and I'll tell him to e-mail them to me.

My mobile rang for the first time today!! Yeah, mom has bought a mobile and she gave me the old one.. I bought a new cover suitable for hiding (I'l have to turn the mobile off and hide it in the school in case of emergency.. I can't just give it to the headmistress till the end of the day!).

Yesterday, we couldn't even lock the out-doors of the house because the Americans were right infront of our house and they might think that we're trying to kill them.. Aya didn't let us sleep since she's got stuck in our house without her mom, she was so active at night and wanted us to play with her!! Then she slept at 2AM!

Okay, I had to change my e-mail address to another one so that I can get my e-mails on my computer.. I'll make it nblog04@hotmail.com

15th of November

While I was writing my previous post, S called and told mom that the stryker was gone. Mom and dad went to S's house to see her husband and his family, and to take Aya and bring her here. So, I have more news about the accident of S's father-in-law death.

He wasn't going to the clinic as we thought. He went to buy some things for Eid on foot. In his way back, shooting started near him, he was standing near a shop and so the shop's owner asked him to come stay in the shop till it calms down a little. In his way to the shop, he was shot with two American bullets, one got in his thigh and went out from the other side, the other hit
his finger and went to the leg too. He bled too much, the shop's owner tried to get him a taxi, but there were a curfew and there are no cars, plus the Americans didn't allow anyone to get near him, you know how!! (For those who don't. A gun is pointed in their faces). After nearly an hour, a man saw him and recognized him and dropped him at the hospital and went back to his family..Of course he was dead by then.

When his family got there, he was already dead. They say that he died in the car. The main cause if his death is that he was bleeding a lot and there were no cars to get him to a hospital immediately.

My brother-in-law arrived to Mosul, and spent the whole way from the garage to the bridge on foot. He passed half of the bridge on foot till Americans stopped everybody and told them to sit on the bridge. They sat there for 1:30 hours, they had futoor there since some people on the bridge were shopping..

He then walked home, got into the house with a smiling face inspite of his tiredness, till he heard the news! Like everyone else, he was shocked.

Another unfortunate person, is my brother-in-law's sister. Who got stuck like us at her house, and couldn't go see her dad for the last time before they buried him, she couldn't even see her mom till today at morning after begging the Americans to get her in.

About the strike.. I thought nobody knew about what happened in Mosul, so I broke it because I thought I should!!

And for those of you who wrote me an e-mail and aren't getting a response.. I'll reply later.

Everything started the day before yesterday; they declared a curfew at Mosul TV from 4PM Wednesday, till 6AM on Friday. The Arabic media didn't mention anything and so half of the Iraqi people didn't know about it.

In the meanwhile my oldest sister was in our house, it has passed 4PM when we knew about it, so we decided to drop her at her house (Which is the same as her parents-in-law) in the morning next day.

The morning came, I was sleeping at my room upstairs, and a war of bullets started... I decided to move myself down when it started to be a heavy fighting and there were also explosions and mom was shouting at me to get down... It was 10AM. My oldest sister was ready to go, but she can't go in such situation so she decided to wait till it clams down.

My brother-in-law was supposed to come before the Eid. We didn't know when exactly, because the hospital's phone is broken... My oldest sister (Let's call her S now) was so worried that he'll come and get stuck in the other side of the city because of the curfew, so she tried to call him on a friend's mobile, it wasn't working but it did at about 11AM, she told her to tell him not to come because the situation is too bad and he won't make it till here.. The friend told her that he already started his way to Mosul an hour ago. Here S started to worry too much!! Till about 11:30, her sister-in -law called and told her to call her husband on the mobile because she's Trying to and failing... She said also that her father-in-law got shot in his leg while trying to get back from the clinic, and he's in the hospital and that her husband should go with him since nobody in the neighborhood can move his head out of the door! The war was horribly improving.

S called her brother-in-law, and he told her that he is in the hospital and that his father has DIED...

I can't describe how I felt, I was crying and shaking and the tears wouldn't go out... I just held Aya who's just lost a grandpa and made sure she won't cry and make things worse. S was terribly SAD, confused, and WORRIED about everything. Mostly about her husband who's in his way to a big surprise and about her sister-in-law who's alone at home in the middle of the war, pregnant in her 9th month..

For 4 hours and a half, we were stuck at home, making sure dad won't get out of the house in this war, trying to clam Aya who was frightened after a loud explosion... Those were one of the most horrible moments in my life. People calling asking if what they've heard about S's father-in-law was true, my sister crying and worried (I've never seen her like that), 3 cars burning in the street, and then S's brother-in-law called and asked about the place where they keep the cotton (They brought his father home, and they're trying to wash him like the Muslims do to their dead before burying them), there were no enough cotton and they can't go out to buy some.

I talked a lot till now so I'll try to shorten things. At 3PM, things calmed down... Dad drove S to her house, and there they were ready to get the body and burry it. Dad went with them since he was his friend, and came back after we've had futoor.

Till 5:30, my brother-in-law finally arrived! Thank God. He was stuck for 1:30 minutes with his luggage on the other side of the bridge, and he came on foot from the bridge to his house, eager to see his little daughter after a month of absence... And here he comes, to find his dad dead and buried!

Nobody knows who shoot him, but everybody knows that he's now in Heaven.
He died in the night of power, fasting, and shaheed. At least he's seen his first grandchild who'll carry his name (Aya)... His son said that this was the death that he's always dreamt of.

I had two eye doctors. Both are dead now!! Imagine! Both are killed now! This one was so kind and he was shy from me more that I was from him. Both men are great in everything and have the best manners and I'm not exaggerating.

Okay, it was a long day that I slept at 10 o'clock and I was so tired. I woke up at 2:30AM (The mosque was calling at that time, telling us to be careful and to guard the neighborhood because a bad group of robbers and destroyers has entered the city somehow!!) and started praying and reading Quran till 5:15AM. It's the night of power, we should pray a lot...

Then mom woke me up at 12AM, I was awake along time ago, but I knew there's nothing to happen, days are looong these days, and the things that happen are rarely good.

Now, we can't even get near S's house. An American Stryker is near the house shooting every car coming near by. We wanted to get Aya here so that S can be more comfortable but we couldn't.

Dad is trying to convince me that everybody has his own day to die and that not allowing him to get out is not a solution!! That's how things are going on, the war is not over and I slept at the sound of bullets and explosions last night... Mom said that this war is the worst among all the others... The Arabic media didn't mention anything!!

Tomorrow is Eid; this is the worse night of Eid I've ever been in. I wonder whether we'll wait for that song يا ليلة العيد، آنستينا like always, or just forget about it..

I'll wake up tomorrow (If I'm alive of course) and put on my new clothes, and see if we're going to get out...

PS: I made lots of mistakes in the brother-in-law, sister-in-law thing since I don't know how you call them in English).

Today is what's called Laylat al-Qadr (The night of power).. It's the night in which the Quran was first told to Mohammed (PBUH), the first word that was told to him was "Read" in a sign to the importance of reading and asking for knowledge. I tried to get you some information about it from the site I always link to, but it seems that it's under maintenance, so here are some links from other sites:

• http://www.sunnah.org/ibadaat/fasting/laylat_ul_qadr.html
• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lailat-ul-Qadr
• http://islam.about.com/library/weekly/aa010300.htm

So, I spent the night yesterday awake last night, reading Qura'an and praying.. The planes and helicopters were flying over us all the time, we heard the sounds of the rockets getting down from the planes but we didn't hear the explosions.. Mom turns on the TV every while to see the news, and you know what's in the news.. I feel sorry, I feel angry, I feel SAD, and feel a strong hatred. I think of those nice women writing to me, a woman telling me how her daughter is in my age, and how she has 5 children and that the oldest is going to Iraq to fight!! I remember the soldiers wives telling me how sorry they are, I remember you telling me how Iraq is going to be and how we're going to be safer, and then start to be angry at everything!! I'm thinking of making a kind of STRIKE and not to blog till things get better and I start to feel better towards you. Everything happening in Falloja is breaking my heart and thinking that dad has no emergency plan if the same happened in Mosul but running away to Baghdad makes me only sadder..

May peace be upon all of us... Najma, waiting for Eid to have a kind of happiness, If we had the chance to get out of the house!

Two new photoshop-edited photos of Aya are now available in the photo album.

Some of you have been explaining how hard and complicated English can be!! Well, that's because you don't know Arabic... For some of you who've e-mailed me to teach them Arabic, you might've understood from what I said that it's almost impossible, because IT IS almost impossible.

In Arabic though, we have 3 tenses, the past, the present and the future... That's easy, but it's too complicated, there are lots of rules and grammars to understand, you can't just change the verb to another tense, you can't memorize the irregular verbs like in English because everything is irregular. You can take this as an example:

- * Kataba: is a verb in the past tense, it means wrote, and it contains only 3 letters in Arabic. And you can only say Kataba if the subject is a singular musculine.
* If it's a singular feminine, we say Katabat.
* If the subject is two (females or males) we say Katabah.
* If the subject is a plural musculine, we say kataboo.
* If the subject is a plural feminine, we say katabnah.

- * Yaktubu: is the verb Kataba's present tense, it contains 4 letters in Arabic. And you can only say Yaktubu if the subject is a singular musculine.
* If it's a singular feminine, we say Taktobo. While if you're talking to her and saying "You're writing" it'll be Taktobeen.
* If the subject is two males, we say yaktoban. While if you're talking to them and saying "You're writing" it'll be Taktoban.
* If the subject is two females, we say taktoban.
* If the subject is a plural musculine, we say yaktoboon. While if you're talking to them and saying "You're writing" it'll be Taktoboon.
* If the subject is a plural feminine, we say taktobna.

And for ordering verbs, it's something ELSE!
It's a mess!! Still, of you want to be good, nothing will stop you. Till you go to an Arabic country and expect everybody to talk like this, you'll be surprised. Every country or city has found its own simple Arabic, and if the city had been occupied in the past, you might find them saying some words that are not Arabic at all... In Mosul, we sometimes say Turkish words!

Like French, for each adjective, there's a feminine form and a muscular form. For example:
Najma: it means a star, a feminine adjective that has 4 letters.
Najm: is the musculine form of Najma, it has 3 letters.

We have too many pronouns, some can be attached to the word itself, and some can't... The ones that can't, are called separated pronouns. We have pronouns that can be seen, and some that can't be seen which are called hidden pronouns.

I had an Arabic examination today; the idea of this post was forming in my head since the morning... In the examination, the teacher told us to point to the pronouns in a sentence that she gave us; I forgot to write the hidden pronouns!! The time was not enough to look for them!

Also, in Arabic there are few letters that you can't even pronounce... Like:
- Ayn ع which is the first sound that we say in the word Iraq.
- Qaf ق which is the last sound in Iraq.. We pronounce Iraq differently than you do.
- Kha'a خ which I can't find an example for.
- Dhad ظ and dha'a ض which are the most important in Arabic.. I guess they're only in Arabic because we sometimes call Arabic "The language of Dhad".

I guess those are the only, correct me if I'm mistaken. Everything you think is complicated in English is much more complicated in Arabic. We have in addition to the letters, some signs that have a similar effect to the vowels in English, which can change the meaning of a word easily.

I've been studying Arabic for 10 years, this year is the 11th. Even the teacher makes mistakes all the time... Last year's teacher was the most competent I've ever seen, she was so lovely and great. I loved her and still love her so much, when she gives us examinations, I know she won't make a mistake. This year, the teacher is so incompetent and she's much worse that many if not all of my school's students. She's so bad at grammar, and Arabic is grammar.

Ancient Arabic poems are so hard; they used difficult words that we don't use now... Poetry was taken care of then much more than now.

Nevertheless, Arabic was crowned when God gave us the Qura'an in it. I believe that there's no other language that could handle this mission better and that could show the meaning it did show in Qura'an. That's why Muslims all over the world should learn Arabic at least for prayers because a sentence in Qura'an won't have its whole meaning if it's not in Arabic.

The Eid is supposed to be on either Saturday or Sunday according to the moon... We'll stop going to school starting from tomorrow... Don't ask why! I don't know. The teachers told us to come, but they're never serious in similar situations... I feel guilty but the whole class made an agreement and I won't betray them. Each year, they tell us that we should come, then when we come they tell us that it's a situation that we shouldn't ask about, we should just not come so that they won't have to come and prepare for Eid too.

This is dear Aya after taking a bath, she's put her full-of-soap hands in her eyes and when she got out of the bath her eyes were so red and she looked so CUTE.

I finally went to the dentist the day before yesterday. I've been complaining about my teeth for about 2 months. Dad had a problem in his tooth and in the next day we went to the dentist!! It's right that I was angry about the fact that it should've been earlier, but I was pleased that I'll go fix my teeth.

We called the dentist who's also my cousin's husband, and asked him when he'll go his clinic, he said that he'll go in 30 minutes and so did we. We went there (I and dad, we dropped mom and HNK at some clothes' shops) and the dentist hadn't arrived yet, dad waited for him in the street, I stayed in the car and slept for a couple of minutes. He was late, he tried to call us on the mobile but the mobiles network is having problems these days so he didn't succeed in calling us.

We went in with him, dad wanted me to be chacked first (He thought I didn't have anything). The doctor looked and started counting!! 1--2-- And stopped, and grapped a tool and wanted to start working. That's something I don't like about dentist, they don't say anything, they just start working and working and ask questions while working! I asked him what I had before he could put that tool in my mouth, he said that he needs to fill 2 teeth, and that he'll fill one today and leave the other till after Eid. Then he said that this tooth is so sick and might not survive. WAIT A MINUTE! Wat do you mean. He said that he might need to get me a root-canal. And here all what you've said started coming in mind, how scary root-canals can be and such things. He asked if I wanted him to give me anasthesia, and I said yes.. He started digging and digging while I started thinking and thinking, if he filled two teeth, i'll have four filled teeth in my mouth :( The weird thing is that each time I go to the dentist and have a filling, I come home and check and see 2 teeth filled only. All the fillings are for those two teeth.. He said that I can go home and if I had any pain I should call him. He also said that I shouldn't eat anything on this tooth (I'm fasting, that won't be a problem)..

Dad then dropped me while I couldn't move my mouth to a shop where I met mom and HNK and he went to his clinic. And from there, mom took me to a shoes' shop to buy one for me, I couldn't find what's in my mind. I asked mom before getting in not to ask me anything because I can't talk. Even the owner of the shop (Who's a slso a colleague of mom) noticed that I'm not well.. He's used to me talking all the time!

Then we got home, I tried to sleep before the futoor's time. I woke up and I still couldn't move my mouth. I had a horrible time trying to eat..

I guess I'm writing lots of personal stuff in the last days. I think it's because I sort of stopped writing letters.. In the last couple of days, presidents were being re-elected, getting into hospital and dying. I was worried about Yasir Arafat, it seems that he's alittle better today. I made dad tell me the whole story about Palestine and how it became like this.. He started from prophet Abraham's times!! I just hate how the Israelis are discussing how Arafat can't be burried in Palestine (Or as they said Israel), he hasn't died yet people. And it's his country! Nobody has the right to choose for him!

I've tried to post a picture of Aya but it seems that Hello (The program I use for posting pictures) was not working properly..I'll try today too, we'll see.

Weather is getting cooler, when I was waiting for the dentist to come in the car, I saw two men walking, one was wearing a TShirt and the other was wearing a leather jacket!! That's how the weather is.. Confusing.

Have any of you watched the film "True man show".? Isn't it amazing? I ahven't watched it recently but I watched it a couple of times in the break. It was so interesting! Everytime I watch it I discover new things in it.. When I was small *Pretending that I'm not anymore* I used to think that I might be the only one on this planet, that if I'll get out of the room everybody else will disappear till I come back. I thought that they might all be actors and I'm the only one who's real, that was what all that movie about. I can't imagine how he felt when he knew it, when everything around him suddenly started making much more sense, when he found out that his father is not dead or that all his childhood photos are fake!!

I'd like to refer to a new site that might get your attention.
And a blog that I noticed recently from a letter of its writer..

A new discovery, I'm so dumb, people.. Do you want to know why?

Yesterday, I was writing the exercises of the Arabic Grammar subject at school, I was watching TV at the same time AND suddenly I saw a paper in the book. It was full of writings in English, I wondered what might be in it since I haven't written any homework on paper, not in English nor in French, so, I looked more and there I found my name at the top and the answers of the last French examination!! Then I got into a shock and calmly told mom: "Mom, a disaster!! I didn't give the French teacher my exam's paper, I still have it here.. It's been two days since the last exam and I forgot to give her the answers paper!!". Mom was shocked too, I first was laughing then I figured out how DUMB I was and that I might lose 20 grades because of this!! I wanted to cry but couldn't spare more than few tears.. Again few tears while explaining to dad and other few tears before going to sleep. What's the teacher going to do? We don't have French for today, so I had to look for her and she was not in our school, she was in the school that's near ours and that's a